A student asked me a question this week.
Their company was invited to a senior-level networking event.
They wanted to know:
Should they shake as many hands as possible?
Or should they start conversations and hope to find a buyer?
My answer surprised them.
Do anything you want.
But do not sell.
Yes, really. Stop selling.
Stop the pitch.
Stop the 32 “lead qualification” questions you memorised from a sales course.
Stop linking every sentence back to your product features.
And please…
Stop pushing people to make a decision on the spot.
Because everyone in the room already knows what you’re doing.
And they hate it.
After years in business development across Asia, Europe, the Middle East and Russia…
I learned something simple.
The only sales skill worth mastering is curiosity.
Not manipulation.
Not persuasion frameworks.
Not scripts.
Just genuine curiosity.
People Remember How You Make Them Feel
When you look someone in the eye and ask a real question…
Something changes.
Instead of feeling like a target, the other person feels like a human being.
And conversations become interesting again.
Try asking something unexpected.
For example:
“What’s your superpower?”
At first you’ll get laughter.
Then you’ll get something real.
Someone might tell you they:
• raise three kids while running a company
• write science fiction novels at night
• dive coral reefs in Indonesia
• study Japanese culture
• volunteer at a charity
Suddenly you’re not having a sales conversation anymore.
You’re having a human conversation.
And that’s where trust begins.
The Biggest Mistake in Networking Events
Most people try to talk to everyone.
That’s a mistake.
Networking is not a numbers game.
It’s a relationship game.
Two strong conversations are worth more than twenty superficial introductions.
The Secret Nobody Talks About: Homework
Before any event I do one thing.
Homework.
I check:
• who is attending
• their company
• recent news
• LinkedIn activity
• hobbies or interests
Why?
Because the first minute of a conversation matters.
When you understand someone’s world, the conversation becomes natural.
And meaningful conversations are rare at business events.
Which means you instantly stand out.
What Happens Next
Eventually the person will ask:
“So what do you do?”
This is where most people ruin the moment.
They start pitching.
Don’t.
Just explain in one sentence.
Then return the conversation to them.
No bragging.
No pressure.
Just presence.
The Real Goal of Networking
Not a sale.
Not even a lead.
A relationship.
Because relationships compound.
Today’s conversation partner might become:
• tomorrow’s client
• next year’s partner
• or your diving buddy in the Red Sea.
And trust me…
You wouldn’t pitch aggressively to a friend while diving in Cozumel.
My Favourite Sales Advice Ever
A mentor once told me something I never forgot.
“You have two ears and one mouth.
Use them in that proportion.”
It might be the simplest business development strategy ever created.
But it still works.
Curious about your experience:
What’s the worst sales pitch you’ve ever experienced at a networking event?
And what made it so bad? 😄
Curiously,
Audrius
